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These desperate days have seen a rise in people seeking spiritual awareness and we now love everyone and everything! So why is it when people say they are in love with not one person but two does it become a strenuous tug of war with the heartstrings and mind?  Clearly people are more than capable of having sex with more than one person at a time, that would be more about having experiences or a high sex drive…I’m no snob and believe you should have encounters that make you smile on the train to work only to realize that people are watching you recall your afternoon of ‘playfulness’. As long as it’s safe, consensual and you’re not hurting anyone you gotta do what you gotta do!

So what happens when feelings are now part of the equation?  You never thought it could be possible to love two people simultaneously but here you are ‘Torn between two lovers’ (like the song says) but the lyrics also say feeling like a fool.  But why is it foolish?  Love isn’t for fools and for anyone who doesn’t believe in it I feel a deep sadness for you.  You love each person because he or she has certain qualities that draw you to them.  Perhaps they are the qualities that you need just one person to have in abundance.

Two stars have fallen from the sky smack bang in the middle of your life and you think you have to choose one of them; perhaps this is the universe’s way of helping you to understand which love is good for you?  It’s a force that you can’t reckon with but it is a force that when shared with one person is all you need.  People come along and turn things upside down, inside out and confuse you.  Try thinking outside of the box you are in where all you see is them when actually the answer is somewhere else.  You won’t be able to notice that yet but if you keep the windows of your soul open the ‘One’ will appear.

I go on a lot about the ‘One’ especially in previous blogs and whilst many people I know have given up on it I refuse to!  You see there are reasons why you go through things in life, some life changing and some mind bending (trust me I know) but what will never change is that there is a reason for everyone who walks in and walks out.  I can just about cope with one man strolling in but two?  No doubt these two people are special but have you thought about their weak points?

Cupid has shot his arrow twice, the greedy swine you’re delicate heart now pierced in two places; you can’t see straight for the love cloud that is circling around you like an unstoppable tornado…you are trapped.  Can being trapped in this triangle really be love?  You find yourself in an impossible situation and the only escape route is to ask questions and plenty of them.  Perhaps, when you are ready there is just one question that needs to answered…  …which one of the two, loves YOU more??

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013

As a writer, you have to keep your mind and eyes wide open so as not to miss an opportunity to write a story and as you know, the source of my inspiration comes from the things I spot when I’m out and about. I had one of those moments and it made me giggle. Let me set the scene, the sun is shining and I see two girls wearing clothes that leave little to the imagination; denim shorts that show perhaps a little too much cheek and strutting their sexy stuff in front of a man walking with his missis…what’s a fella to do?

After spotting one of these girls in particular my eyes swiftly turned to look at the predictable reaction of his missis, why not look at the husband first? Well that would be boring, I mean you just know that any red-blooded male wouldn’t have the strength to look anywhere else even the blue sun filled sky would seem invisible to any male at this point. My goodness, she bore a whole in him so deep with a glare that screamed out without saying a word, “Don’t even think about looking if you know what’s good for you”!

Did she really think that he didn’t notice this girl? She did and so did I!  He has probably become a master of expertly seeing things out of the corner of his eye. It’s what men do, anything to stop the grief that will follow. The back turned in the marital bed (Cold) and one less sausage than is usual on his dinner plate but one extra for the family pooch who is licking his lips with glee knowing his master is in the dog house!

What a carry on and waste of her energy!  People will look, that is a fact; we have eyes for a reason and I’m sure if the shoe was on the other foot she would be having a gander at some hot bloke if the chance presented itself, it’s what we all do; standard practice if you have blood running through your veins. These are just some of the things an insecure woman would do, maybe she is insecure for a reason only she knows, perhaps she sees it as rude and disrespectful or maybe she’s having an ‘emotional’ day? We do have them and some things will bother us more one day than another.

So calm down, the truth is it was only a fleeting glance; personally I’d be wondering what’s wrong with him if he didn’t look!  Maybe this will change conventional thinking but in my opinion the negative methods used by women to get their own back are out of date and quite honestly useless, unless, he’s taken things a step further; that’s another blog altogether. I would rather do the following…

Don’t scrimp on his dinner portions
Put him before the dog
Face him in bed; the only things his eyes are looking at now are yours

I’m not one to burn my bra as many of you know but I do want an easy drama free life and whilst there’s a no money back guarantee with my methods you will gain something else that is far more valuable…your sanity!

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013

Are you one of life’s good listeners? Attracting people who just want to expose their souls to a complete stranger is a very humbling experience and if you are a human being who doesn’t think twice about giving up a few minutes to hear them, more power to you!  It happens to me often, to the point where I think I should charge for counselling services; I would have made a mint by now.  Oddly enough they have done more for me and all of them have left an imprint on my mind and have given me so much to think about.

One of these was a cab driver who on looking at me through his rear view mirror decided it would be an opportune moment to tell me his love life story.  People feel the need to talk and that’s a good thing, perhaps it’s easier with someone you’ve never met before and will never cross paths with again; unless there is only one cab driver in Essex!  Anyway, as I’m big on loyalty (even with someone I’ve only met once) I won’t go into detail, but it made me think.

Like the ‘shrink’ from the ‘Sopranos’, I listened seeming detached at first but then found myself almost hypnotized by his heart-felt story. Finally, once I’d heard the entire tale, I asked the question. What kind of woman do men want? I understood the answer to mean a cross between an innocent servant girl from a Bollywood movie and the Greek Goddess, Aphrodite.

The servant girl: Smelling of detergent and saffron, avoids direct eye contact with the use of her intricately detailed veil and whilst her gaze is low, she allows him to talk without interrupting. She only speaks to ask his name and tells him she likes it.  Then, she is silent once more. He wonders if he will ever hear her sweet voice again or if he heard it in the first place. She continues with her chores leaving him dumb founded!

Aphrodite: Smelling of Roses and honey, her veil is on the floor!  She also, is silent. Her actions speak a thousand words.  She has captured him in more ways than one and she knows it. She wants him to hold her but takes her pleasure by holding him and it shows.  She will lead him to believe that there will never be another woman for him, not in this lifetime or the next.  Only a fool would let her go!

Very different interpretations of women looking for love but they have two things in common, an air of mystery and confidence.  Giving off a vibe that suggests you are in some way weak, vulnerable or easy will put a man off instantly or you become easy prey for a swooping vulture.  In reality only men know what they want and what they are looking for, you’d be wasting your time trying to figure it out.  Figure yourself out first, be sure of who you are; only then will you be sure of someone else.

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013

I got a very intriguing and out of the blue Tweet from a good friend of mine asking if I could write about something that had obviously got her feathers ruffled.  Not one to ignore the plea of a mate I’ll give it my best non-judgmental shot!

You date someone and YOU think it’s going well, then on the third dinner date he drops his seafood platter and says, “I’m not ready for dating but can we be friends? 

Anyone who has gone through this or something similar will have a lot of questions they will want to ask the ‘Dumper’ and you will be questioning yourself too…the ‘Dumped’! The all too predictable stages you will go through are:

Hell hath no fury like a woman who’s choked on her starter…

Why did you wait till the third date, you could have called me before?  I wouldn’t have put on my best Jimmy Choo’s!  Well, this all depends on what he said to you during those dates but ultimately they were only dates not a lifetime commitment.

You watch Embarrassing bodies for research purposes…

Even the most confident of people have their insecurities and will have an off day thinking that they weren’t good enough in some way. Just remember, you won’t be everyone’s cup of tea but that doesn’t mean to say that you will never be someone’s Champagne Cocktail!

Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps…

• He’s too busy; a woman is a nice distraction but a distraction all the same.  Men like to stay focused on business especially when they have a goal in mind.
• He’s in ‘construction’; the fella that you’re dating could be more Tony Soprano than Tony Smith.
• He’s married, going through a rough patch or separation and you are just what he thinks he needs to move on; what he didn’t bank on was the guilt that followed.  Perhaps he should have told you?  No perhaps about it, of course he should! But you don’t know the in’s and out’s and he will be going through more than you realise, he’s not ready…yet.
• He just wants to have fun!  Well why not, he hasn’t promised to put a ring on it or tell you he wants you for his baby mamma…has he?

Honestly…

I could go on and on and on but who needs to waste more time working out a problem that turns your brains to mush and saps all your energy?  And they say women are hard to work out!  When someone opens the door to you it’s quite amazing but there can come a time when they slam it shut and in your face! It’s the ending that we find hard to come to terms with; no matter the gender or situation.  So he says he’d like to stay in touch, depending on the fella it means he’s either hoping it will fizzle out eventually or you really are someone he’d like to have as a friend.

One thing is certain,  if you want a lasting friendship try not to broadcast your private business on Twitter.  You’ll lose the right followers and gain the wrong ones.

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013