Happy in Love?

I asked my friends to tell me in just one word what makes them happy. Some mentioned food, football, cats and movies; this is why I write. They surprise me and quite often make me laugh with their ideas and no holds barred honesty. The people have spoken and have kindly given me much to think about for blog posts spanning the next month maybe more! There was a word that came up a lot not just on its own but within a phrase or sentence that means so much to them that perhaps it’s the only thing that truly matters; LOVE!

Yep, that word comes up a lot and everyone has their own vision of love, but does your vision match that of another? If it doesn’t then how can it be love? To me love means being loyal, compassionate and unselfish whilst having the best interest of the other person at heart…who ever that might be. The only way for love to manifest is if these ideals are mutual. The sad thing is that most people convince themselves that they are and make allowances for the wrong person leaving themselves exposed to heartache. But no one ever listened to a friend telling them they are looking like a fool; it’s when you start feeling like one that things start to change.

So what isn’t love? Control has nothing to do with love; when someone stops you from doing something that is important to you simply because they don’t want you to grow. This probably has more to do with their own fear that they might lose you but in truth it has more to do with the fact that they are envious of your spirit…never let them dampen yours. If only they could be as enthusiastic as you in your hopes and dreams for the future, they are incapable and what’s more they are ignorant to the fact that they will lose you anyway…inevitable.

It isn’t rocket science really but you may find yourself going through this very thing. I’ve been through it and had no doubt in my mind that I would walk eventually, and I did (more than once) I got to thinking how many people are there in the world and I subject myself to something or someone who makes me feel like I’m walking on egg shells? I’d rather be walking on air thank you very much! Some of you are lucky in love and have found instantly without the drama that one person who is willing to share, listen, encourage and support you. Others will take the longer route but you learn things along the way; the trick is never to repeat the mistakes of the past otherwise it was all for nothing.

For me real love has no hidden agenda; it shouldn’t be about what’s in it for you, now that would be selfish wouldn’t it? It’s a question that’s not easy to answer but being honest is the first step to love, in whatever form that may take.