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The ‘F’ word…

shebfierce
Made you look!  Be honest, most of you were thinking the same thing right? 
 
No, I was referring to a word that once found, will give you the greatest feeling but searching for it can be the most painful experience you will ever go through.  I am of course speaking of ‘FREEDOM’. 
 
Mel Gibson cried out for it as William Wallace in Braveheart, George Michael sang about it, firstly with Wham and then as a solo artist. Dr Martin Luther King and many other brave figures in history spoke of freedom of speech and our liberty; freedom fighters that changed the way we live for the better.  But for many the freedom we seek is much more personal and is a day to day fight. Described best by Bob Marley:

”None but ourselves can free our minds”. 
 
There are times when you will just want to throw the towel in and give up…those days are many.  Ever noticed that when you hit rock bottom, something changes and you start to fight again?  Maybe that’s where we go wrong; fight another F word that means you have to struggle yet again.  There is an F word that maybe, just maybe we should consider, ‘FAITH’.
 
Religious or not, it doesn’t matter, to have faith means you believe that things will be better.  Pride shows strength but it can all get a little confusing when your ego comes into play.  Ego ‘the self’,  thinking that you can keep it all in without anyone ever knowing what you’re really going through can be so damaging…I found that out the hard way.  So you think you don’t want to bother anyone with your problems?  In my experience I have learned that people want to be bothered by you, ok not everyone (choose wisely) but there are those who truly have your best intentions at heart and whose words of wisdom can open a door that seemed to be firmly shut.
 
The journey you choose to take and it is your choice, maybe a long one but trust me, the place you want to be is there waiting for you.
 
Believe you can and you will. 
© Michelle Sotiriou 2012
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On your bike?

shebfierce
Dilemma’s, two possibilities but which do you choose?
 
My buddy Collette and I decided to escape to the sun.  It was October and rainy London wasn’t very appealing so off we went to Rhodes for a girlie holiday.  A holiday with a friend can test your relationship but not for me and Collette, 20 years on and we are still friends.
 
Our apartment was on a steep hill next to an army base (this is what happens when you book a last minute cheap deal) so we decided to hire a scooter to get us to the beach.  The man we hired it from was dodgy to say the least and didn’t look the type to be messed with.  He may have been the Don of the island for all we knew and was probably known as ‘The Papa’ to anyone who feared him. 
 
To cut a long story short, we crashed!  We reached the top of that god forsaken hill and lost our balance. If this where a romance novel the soldiers from the barracks would be jumping over the fence to come and rescue the damsels in distress; but it’s not, so there we were broken scooter and bloody knees…I still have the scars on my knee to this day.
 
Now we were faced with a dilemma; take the scooter back to ‘The Papa’, explain what happened and accept our fate or leave the scooter outside his shop in the middle of the night? (this covert operation would take some planning)   After weighing everything up we dumped it outside his shop…dishonest maybe but we were two girls in a foreign land and scared very scared!
 
The next day we sat in the local bar and a girl rode up in a scooter that had a crack on the front…it was our scooter and was now in the hands of someone else.  I can’t even begin to explain the relief we felt at that moment…this called for a bottle of Ouzo!  We duped the ‘The Papa’!  There was no contest when faced with not one but two women with a brain!
 
Funny, we wanted to escape the British weather and ended up trying to escape from the sunshine of a Greek Island…go figure!
 
It seems to me that when faced with a dilemma, trying to figure out which choice is the right one means that neither would be right at all.  What if there is another option that you just can’t see because you have been blinded by panic, fear even love? 
 
As for me, I would rather be where the sun shines.  Metaphorically speaking, that could be anywhere.  
© Michelle Sotiriou 2012
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‘Skin’ a poem

shebfierce
Bent over I hang onto the wall, 
you pierce me with a needle that is none too small. 

Gritted teeth and weakening arms, 
you handle me with care no need for alarm.
Strong are you but gentle in touch, pain before pleasure,
I’ve never known so much.  

One hand holds, the other is the artist,
naked my skin on which you are bold.
Never have I felt this spin that I’m in, 
a secret sensation about to begin. 

Safe in these hands, ink a dark hue, 
embedded for eternity my tattoo.
© Michelle Sotiriou 2012
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She came, she conquered…

shebfierce
Phobias, we all have them.  But what about the phobias that mean more to you, yet seem completely unbelievable to others?  I’m not talking about a fear of heights or deep water. These are just two which suggest possible danger and you would be right to protect yourself ‘safety first’.  No, I’m referring to weird phobias.
 
I have a thing about buttons, the very thought of button’s makes me cringe and touching them? Ahhhhhh!  One phobia I had no choice but to overcome was my fear of spiders.  There I was in the ‘ladies room’ and an 8 legged friend decided to chill on the toilet paper.  A face-off between me and the beast ensued but when nature calls there can only be one winner!  Phobia conquered.
 
Dentists and motorbikes are two more phobias I wanted to look square in the eyes and beat.  Well, I had the opportunity to do both on a trip to Romania, Bucharest to be precise.  We landed to the sound of passengers clapping.  Clapping because we’d landed safely or clapping because they were happy to be in Bucharest?  I still haven’t figured out which but a happy clapper can’t be a bad thing.
 
The reason for my trip was to have some dental work done at HappyDent. Seriously I never thought going to a dentist would be so much fun.  Vlad (the dentist) would play Dean Martin to put me at ease and it worked like a dream. I love Deano anyway, there’s nothing like the sound of a crooner when you’re in the dentist’s chair about to open wide. Injections and plenty of them make you want to sing along, try singing ‘Volare’ with an open mouth…believe me it’s not easy!
 
New teeth, a new found confidence and a bike ride through Bucharest was now on offer.  Yes, Vlad (the dentist) has a Dragster beautiful, sexy and purrs like a kitten. A piece of art in my opinion. Chrome and metallic green a beast of a machine and his pride and joy.  My fear turned to excitement, I couldn’t wait to climb on and feel the power.  Theresa (the dentists wife) loaned me a helmet, pink and not really me. I was expecting a black number with skull and crossbones etched on the side…I was getting ahead of myself.
 
After holding onto Vlad (the dentist) for dear life and head butting him from behind with the pink helmet, I got into my stride.  Fear was replaced with a feeling of euphoria and if I could have patted myself on the back I would have but like I said I was holding on…tight. Memories that will stay with me forever.  New friends, new experiences and new teeth! 
 
I have learned that phobias and fears only supress good feelings. Trust in yourself and you will feel good…what’s so scary about that?
© Michelle Sotiriou 2012