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They say variety is the spice of life and a pinch of just about everything will do you good, I didn’t think that when I went to my first abs class. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a believer in exercise and its undoubted ability to make me feel quite happy as well as tone the parts my office chair can’t reach. I crunched and planked my way through a 45 minute session and when the music slowed down, I thought, finally, we’re coming to the end; the instructor had different ideas to mine.

She fooled me and backed up the tape, my fears of doing the same thing over and over became a reality. Nicole Sherzinger’s ‘Don’t Hold Your Breath’ reverberated in my ears like torture; I nearly held my breath but gripped the edges of my floor mat instead. These repetitive yet necessary movements for the abs I’ve always wanted led to an epiphany as I lay on the studio floor; oh the monotony of it all!

Doing the same thing each day is alright if you enjoy it and feel contented; but what if you feel that it’s getting you nowhere? Nowhere is a lonely, uninhabited place and the reason you are there is habit. We all have habits and have adopted them for many reasons, mainly because we thought they were a good idea at the time.

We are so hooked that we believe how we do things is part of our character and that we shouldn’t change. It takes courage to admit that you have to let go of certain actions and your thinking. What happens when you do is quite amazing, I mean as long as you’re breathing what’s the worst that can happen if you do?

Those that have taken the time to understand and know you will be relieved that you have seen the new light yourself, will continue to have your back and become as excited as you about your future; the downside is that you will notice some confusion from others who will feel that your sudden decision to switch things a little doesn’t suit them. This is when you also break another habit, refusing to acknowledge friends or sadly family who are insincere.

You can go on two things when wanting to try something different, logic and feeling. The logical approach is like using a Sat Nav to guide you and if by some reason you get lost you can always blame this new technology and the people who made it. Going on gut instinct means you choose to read a map or at least try to, if you take one wrong turn because you can’t tell a motorway from a dual carriage way it’s your fault, no one else to shout at when you’re driving around and around in unfamiliar territory; but what a euphoric moment when YOU find the right road…yes YOU!

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013

‘If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine. It’s lethal’ – Paul Coelho

The female bond rarely breaks and if it does creates a pain that is indescribable. It can take years to separate those with an agenda and the ones who have no other motive other to be sincere in every aspect of your friendship. After watching James Franco and Seth Rogan in Pineapple Express it occurred to me that Bromance is no different but of course it’s all about male bonding. There is however something that links the two; unselfish behaviour. The truth is we would do anything for each other even if it means being brutally honest…tough love.

I can’t imagine being without my girls. Each personality is different from the other but somehow we all mould into one. No one will fight with more heart for you and whilst others will listen your girls will hear you; people will tell you that they understand but your brothers and sisters will give it to you straight. Harsh at times, they know they wouldn’t be a true friend if they turned a blind eye.

Opposites do attract and the film Steel Magnolias is for me the best example of this. Sexy, cranky, eccentric, geek, and troubled. Each character fascinated by the other and wishing they had just an ounce of their friend’s unique qualities themselves. So the next best thing is to surround yourself with a joker who thinks of ways to get you laughing even when you don’t feel like it, someone to feed your mind with interesting facts you’ve never heard before, someone who isn’t scared of taking chances when all you do is dream about doing something that’s out of character and someone brazen enough to display her ample cleavage wearing a skirt way above her knees with complete confidence.

There will be fights, yes there are plenty of them and they are usually born from frustration, passion and men. We don’t fight over men but there will always be one of your friends who’ll refuse to hold back and tell you straight what a fool you look. Deep down you know it’s all true but you do it anyway; she will say I told you so, another will tell you to get back on the horse you fell from there are plenty more where he came from and the shoulder to cry on? You know, the one that cry’s with you and provides the medicinal ice cream in the hope it will cure you.

We create a circle that can’t be broken by anyone but us, if you feel as though your fingers are slipping and you stop holding hands just for a moment the circle collapses; you collapse too. Both sexes are sentimental another trait we have in common and it’s true that we sometimes get distracted but all we have to do is remember those who stopped us from tumbling down and if at some point in our lives we fall with a thud those who extended their hand to pull us back up again.

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013

‘The biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of loving her’.

Bob Marley

I start this blog with a quote from one of the coolest men to have ever lived. Bob Marley was married, had 6 children 2 of which he adopted and another 6 from different women. Feminists everywhere will be disgusted at these facts and will be burning their bras in united protest. I watched a documentary recently about a Jamaican man who was married to the same woman for over 20 years and had 15 children not all of them by her. He’s got time! It all seemed very normal to him and his family but the trend on Twitter wasn’t so understanding.

This isn’t a Jamaica slamming blog, trust me when I say that many men have baby’s from other mothers; this way of life is not exclusive to Jamaicans. There are those who choose to hide it by ignoring their child completely or handing the mother a few quid so as not to rock the boat he is smoothly sailing on. For all those reading this hissing and man hating you do know that this kind of arrangement works and is acceptable for a lot of these women?

Once again we are back to preconceived ideas and the notion that anything other than 1 + 1 is outrageous and insensitive. We all know about Adam and Eve and the belief that God created them to live in paradise on earth; that was until he tested Adam and Eve was tricked too, eating a banana when she shouldn’t have done..tut tut! Like them you will probably choke on the forbidden fruit that you have taken a large bite from or you’ll get a granny smith thrown at you with force.

Women do have a choice and whilst some are honestly unaware of his fruity antics there are others who know exactly what they are getting into and accept it as their lot in life. Are they happy with sharing him though? We ask children to share from a young age as it teaches them how to give and be selfless so are we contradicting ourselves now by saying sharing a partner is out of the question? Well I don’t believe sharing is caring when it comes to this subject; a woman who knows her weight in fruit won’t put up with feeling like a gooseberry while he’s out popping cherries!

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013

Yes,  I love football! I have done since I saw Liam Brady score a goal some players can only dream about firing in the back of the net and Alan Sunderlands’ hat-trick defeating the old enemy Tottenham Hotspur 5-0 in 1978. I was 7 years old and watching that match ignited my passion for the beautiful game and Arsenal Football Club. Did I look at other teams and wonder if I should switch? I had one wobble, Ricky Villa got me very confused with skills that blew me sideways and his compadre Ozzy Ardiles was just as amazing to watch. It was the Argentinian invasion I didn’t see coming but I remained a loyal ‘Gooner’ and just learned to appreciate how talented players from rival teams were.

One of the things I like most about football is the banter and opinions between fathers, females’ and football widows. Amongst the rolling of the eyes when their men are having a loud debate about who is the greatest, these women know a thing or two just by listening. Occasionally, one of them will throw a spanner in the works and silence the testosterone filled room. Just that very thing happened whilst the fathers’ at my nephews football club were discussing Brazil’s Pele and Argentina’s Maradona. One was adamant that Maradona was nothing short of ‘phenomenal’ and the other 8 strong were having none of it for them Pele was and still is the man.

So the proverbial spanner had touched down with a thud and it was me that threw it into the arena, well why not? I was busting a gut to say something so I thought what’s the worst that could happen. They might laugh, they might put me down or say “What do you know?” Then I thought, hang on for as many men that there are in the room there are women…back up!!!  So my moment came when they decided to draw breath for a second all I needed was the space to say one word, ‘Zidane’. Silence, you could have heard a pin drop. I felt quite empowered but then I thought, “Oh gawd, someone say something please”. Sometimes, it takes a lot to gain the respect of others and for a woman football is a tough stage to stand on and be heard. But they did hear me and I got the acceptance nod from all of them and the “Oh yeh, she has a point,” collective remark.

Our opinion on most subjects holds more weight if we have the knowledge to back it up. There is a chance that your peers will listen and will sometimes be surprised by the sense you make. If you are passionate about something learning more about it will be a pleasure and what’s more, your mind will soak it up like a sponge. The greatest is still a matter for continued debate for the fathers’ at the Arsenal Academy and I will be throwing in another name the next time when we discuss defenders. I’ll be doing what any good footballer does…forget that I might lose the ball or fall flat on my behind and just get stuck in!

© Michelle Sotiriou 2013