On a clear night in smoky London, I seem to be drawn to my window as if being pulled by some invisible force making me look. The first thing I see as my eyes rise up to the midnight blue sky is a star that shines like no other. Bigger than the others that faintly twinkle, in front of me, as though it has decided to settle there for my viewing pleasure every time there is a night like this.
I hope you can all see it too, it’s quite something. I can’t help but be in awe of these celestial gems and wonder if they are just cosmic particles floating in outer space or if they are the souls of those we have loved and lost telling us that they are still with us; how many pull back the lined curtains in order to acknowledge their existence?
The loss of anyone in their physical form is indescribable and not easily explained to anyone who hasn’t been through that kind of pain. After a long and arduous journey, I have reached a place where dreading the word goodbye has been replaced with gratitude; thankful that I was given the opportunity to say hello.
When someone leaves, we always say it was too soon, we didn’t have enough time and as we ponder over our misfortune, we are in danger of overlooking the footprints they left behind. Life should be celebrated and as long as we continue to breathe it is up to us to learn and even pass on the lessons which through confusion and distractions can be easily forgotten; unless you reflect.
I know too well how much this can hurt and after losing both parents can understand how reflection is like someone pulling you back to a place you don’t want to revisit when time and experiences will bring you back anyway. It’s inevitable, as you get to know yourself with thought and expression that the unexpected epiphanies will come enabling you to finally acknowledge the obvious.
Is it all as scary as it sounds? As someone who has had more than a few mind and life altering moments, I can honestly say that looking up at the night sky isn’t as bad as first imagined and as I write this blog post, I am reliably informed the name of the star inspiring me is Venus, named after the Roman goddess of love; if she shines there’s nothing to be afraid of.
© Michelle Sotiriou 2013
‘Venus favours the bold’ – Ovid